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Thursday, December 1, 2011

My Thoughts on Gay Marriage

There's this video going around on Facebook from the MoveOn.Org website.  It's a very well spoken young man, testifying in Iowa on their proposed amendment to ban gay marriage.

Quite simply, he rocks.  He was raised by two women.  He is quite impressive.

And before you ask, no, I am not gay. 

I am, however, human.  I happen to have been born straight, like 92% of most people.  I had my first boyfriend at 6.  I married a man who shoots things and hates cologne. To quote a very good lesbian friend when, after a bad break up I commented "Maybe it's time to change teams"- "Sweetie, you are as straight as they come.  Not that I wouldn't appreciate the cappuccino maker for converting you."

Call me crazy, but I happen to think people are born with their sexuality.  I believe the 1 out of 11 stat.  I have a large family.  On one side, I have 10 cousins.  One is gay  On the other side, I have 14 cousins.  One is gay.  When my parents "told" me about my cousins at various times, I have to say I laughed and replied "And?"  I've known them both my whole life.  I kinda already figured it out. 

I also had a fantastic roommate who I watched struggle with coming out.  I like to say we were "Will & Grace" before Will knew he was Will.  I never would wish that struggle on anyone.  Ever.

I would never choose to be gay in today's world.  If you think someone voluntarily chooses to be ostracized, quite simply, your ignorance frightens me.

As for gay marriage, here's my thought- at the state level it's a legal document protecting two individuals and their property.  I think everyone has a right to that protection.  Period.  I think banning gay marriage is about as ridiculous as banning interracial marriage. 

I absolutely respect your church or religious institution to not allow it.  You have the right to your opinion and beliefs, just as I do.  Your spiritual beliefs are yours.  Just don't force them on me.

I think Jon Stewart said it best when he commented that he changed his mind on gay marriage when he realized he would not be forced to leave his wife and marry a man.

But the parenting issue.... that's always been the big argument against gay marriage.  It'll supposedly turn the kids, our future Americans, into homosexuals.

Actually, it's the opposite.  I've done my own logic proof on this.

Consider this.
  • Straight parenting results in 9% of their offspring being gay.
  • Gay parenting results in 91% of their offspring being straight.
  • Straight parenting accounts for more than 97% of all parenting (27% of gay households report having children under 18.  As 9% of the population, that accounts for just under 3% of total). 
  • Gay parents account for less than 1% of gay offspring (.03*.09)
  • Straight parents account for +99% of gay offspring.
  • Therefore, straight parenting causes gay offspring.
If you are worried about proliferating the gay lifestyle, straight parenting- not gay marriage- is where your focus should be directed.  Let's pass an amendment banning straight parents.

Sounds ridiculous, doesn't it?

Now maybe you get how ridiculous "banning" gay marriage sounds to me.


Roxann G. said...

Well spoken....brought a tear to my eye! Why would we want to judge anyone who just wants love and committment? And, then add to that, not allowing them to adopt children who so badly want a safe and loving home. Makes me crazy thinking about it! Thank you for posting Lori.

Anonymous said...

Where are you reading 10-13% gay?

I have found many polls and studies that show 3-5.5%

Now, most of these reports say "who knows" basically. I just don't see 10 or 13% which would be about 20 million. Where do you get your stats?

Mama Bean said...

I agree that the studies vary. I did a quick Google search and found a few different websites. In the past the 1 out of 11 was always the stat that has been used.

I have to say, from my own personal experience, that seems about right. If I look at my high school graduation class, that seems to be about how many people have come out over 25 years. In my family, that's about right. I've never really had a reason to doubt the stat.

Oddly, many right winged groups (Family Research Council), put the number at 2%, but the average American thinks it's close to 20-25% (that's in the Gallop study). The 2010 Census tracks it closer to 1 in 20, with the caveat that a large number of people refused to answer the question, making statisticians estimate it's higher. Plus throw in the social stigma. I'm very comfortable with my estimate. I trust it more than 3 out of 4 dentists recommending Trident.

And 10-13% of the US population is more than 30 million- not 20. I'm assuming, you're just talking about the US? I don't find it shocking that there would be 30 million gay people in the US. The most interesting stat I found when I searched for gay parenting statistics- Mississippi had the highest percentage of households with gay parents.

But the entire point of the blog is that I don't actually care who is gay and I don't think people should waste their time on it. It's not a disease. It's not something someone chooses.

And it's certainly not a reason to discriminate and single a group of people out from the general populace. Or question their parenting abilities. Regardless if it's 2 or 20% of the population.

Mama Bean said...

Oh- and Anonymous-- I wouldn't question my stats as much as my math!! 1 out of 11 is just under 9%... not 13%! Oops! It was late when I wrote it!!

Leggett said...

Absolutely brilliant, as usual Mama Bean. My sentiments exactly. :)