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Wednesday, May 4, 2011

On Being a Mom

I really had no intention to become a mother.  When my husband and I married, this was a part of the deal- no kids.  I love what I do for a career.  I like to travel.  I generally find most people's children irritating after extended periods.  Sometimes that period is 10 minutes.  Sometimes 2.  And don't even get me started on babies.... no need for me to hold your child, honest.  Anyhow, it really didn't fit into my chart during those "Where do you see yourself in 10 years?" motivational seminars that were so popular in the 90's.

Bet you didn't know that about me, huh?

So how on earth did I become a mother?

Honestly....

I had a little too much to drink on Christmas Eve, 2 months after we got married.

And 39 weeks later, my amazing son Skip (for blog purposes) was born.  Before my first anniversary.

Wow.

Pregnancy didn't even phase me. I blew off my birthing classes because I had been trained as an advanced responder for the Red Cross on how to deliver a baby.  Surely, I could pop one out.  People had been doing it for years.  I wasn't particularly worried.

On our way to the hospital, 1 exit before, it hit me.

I was going to be a mom.

Oh- and I had to get this giant thing out of me somehow.

If you know me, you know I am fairly calm.  I joke that if I had been on the Titanic I would have gotten everyone off and saved the vodka.  But seriously, in a pinch, I'm a good go to person.  I become calm in chaos.

This is why, when I started to say "Wow, we're having a kid..." my husband thought I was being funny.

The down side to being funny most of the time is that sometimes, I'm NOT actually being funny.  Which sadly and often, makes it even funnier to others and less funny to me.

My son arrived a few hours later via emergency c-section. 

And I was a Mom.

A completely unprepared Mom. 

Fortunately for me, my son was quite understanding.  He is mellow.  He is patient.  He rocks.

If God gives you what you can handle, he took one look at me and said "Let's go easy on this one...."

I did read a few books.  My pediatrician gave me great advice- breathe out and relax before you pick up your child- they can sense it.  That was helpful. Check.  Get the baby on a schedule.  Check.  Try not to leave the baby in public places unattended... well... I used to lose purses a lot, so I had to try hard on that one.  Check.

I had never wanted children because so many people I knew complained about it- the sleepless nights, the crying, the poop- ee gads.

What no one mentioned is that it's fun, too.  Because of my kids I've gone down slides, swung at the park on a beautiful day, built train tracks, colored pictures- the list goes on.  All the fun things of childhood that I had given up as an adult.  I get to do them all over again with 2 of the coolest people I know- my kids.

And trust me, as a business owner, having kids is way easier than starting a business.  Lack of sleep and piles of crap are common obstacles in both worlds.

Even though it would be really nice to sleep in past 7 or to go to the bathroom without an interruption, I wouldn't trade it for the world.

People say your children are a reflection of you.  I disagree.  I am a reflection of my children.  I'm kinder.  I'm a better person.  I'm more conscientious.  I have a better sense of what's truly important.  I value time more than anything now.

I honestly feel guilty because I've learned more from them than I could ever teach them.

So yes, I'm a mom.  I drive a crossover, not a sports coupe.  I live in a tract house, not a fancy townhome on the golf course.  I take weekend trips to Knotts Berry Farm, not Maui.  I wear sweats in public... okay, I always did that...  

I tell my kids that Mother's Day is the single most important holiday of the year.  They laugh. But it's true for me.  I don't care if I get nothing more than a hug, some great homemade cards and cereal in bed-- at 7 am.  I've got everything I never knew I needed.

Happy Mother's Day to all the great mom's out there and all the great people who fill in for the ones who aren't!

2 comments:

vitor68 said...

Nice post Lori, and quite funny as well. I really liked the quote, "People say your children are a reflection of you. I disagree. I am a reflection of my children." It sounds like you made the right choice to be a mom!.

Have a great mothers day and just remember; someday a long time from now you will be especially thankful for your children. They will be the ones visiting you in "the ol' folks home! lol!

Robert

Chile Bravo said...

I agree about the comment that you are a reflection of your children. I've so often said how much they've taught me (particularly Mila). I could never go into a hospital before without getting nauseous and dizzy; now I am a pro at navigating the hospital system and getting what we need which has been helpful for other members of my family. I was never able to let stuff roll off my back until I had kids; it has mellowed me and I've lost my road rage, much of my impatience, etc. I agree; motherhood is a gift you never knew you wanted.

Deanne