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Tuesday, January 12, 2016

Still Going...

Here I am on the 12th of January with the workout plan I started last year   ;)

I feel obligated to give an update because despite my best STFU request, I have found that nearly everyone does feel obligated to share their opinion/advice/commentary.

First of all, I am not in the midst of a mental breakdown/emotional crisis.  I got fat and unfit.  I know better.  Health is a huge priority for me so to not be healthy is truly quite bothersome to me.  I have asthma and it is easily manageable when I'm fit.  It is not easily manageable when I'm not.

So I appreciate that support that yes I'm a beautiful person inside and out.  Truly- thanks. 

But I'm still fat.  I'm out of shape. 

I have mirrors.

It happened.

Being out of shape is not healthy.  It could kill me.

Not doing anything is NOT an option.

Owning it is a good thing. 

Second, I already know what works and doesn't work for me.  So when people give me "advice" although I look polite I am going "lalalalalalala" in my head.

What am I doing exactly?

I am showing up for 30 days to the gym.

Showing up.  At least 5 times a week.

Am I doing CrossFit?  No

Am I focusing on cardio?  No

Am I running?  No

Am I doing whatever the lastest trend is?  No

My primary focus is getting there.  For more than a decade, I had no problem going to a gym and working out.  I actually like.

But if I don't go, well, nothing is going to happen.

So I am all about just going.

This is the stuff I've done so far- an hour on the treadmill, a gentle yoga class, circuit/interval training (my favorite), today was just an hour on the recumbent bike....

low intensity.


Because I've gone gung-hu before and thrown out my back and then been on the couch.

I'm all about making it a routine.

And my food?

Not even thinking about it right now.

Because, I don't really eat too poorly to start with AND because it's my birthday next week and I am going to enjoy which includes eating out and having some drinks.

There is also some science behind it.  If I suddenly increased my activity level and cut calories my metabolism- (more on that in a minute)- would then start to worry that I was starving and immediately do its thing and make sure I don't lose an ounce.

Because my metabolism is fantastic.


Yes.  My metabolism works amazingly well.  In fact, it's SO efficient that through all the dieting in the last 10 years, it has adapted and adjusted.

It panics.

In the event of a the apocalypse, it would be awesome.

It wants me to keep my thighs as food storage in the event of the End of Days.

It cares.

So I'm trying to trick it a bit.

This month, just a little increase-- I'm hoping it doesn't notice.

Then next month, I'm cutting much of the sugar and focusing on  vegetables and lean proteins.

Then month three, I'll pump up the work outs just a bit-- and then I'll keep doing that slowly and try to sneak it past my incredibly efficient metabolism who wants me fat for the future apocalypse.

And I'll tweak.  And I'll adjust.  And I'll add more things. 

Also, I can't do a 180.  I can't.

I can slowly change.  Make small adjustments here and there.

This isn't a contest.  In my head, I have a year to make this permanent and have some positive changes.  I need it to stick.

Getting up at 4:15 is getting easier every day.  Sorta.

My friend Stacey ROCKS.  She has shown up every single day. Seriously.  She is the very first gym buddy I've ever had that has done this.  She could work out at any time of day and she is voluntarily getting up at the crack of dawn to meet me.  She is a night person, too, so this is not easy.

And yet she's there.

And because she's there, I go.

Because she's there.  Because I need to make this habit.  Because I would sleep in if she wasn't.  Because she was fine riding bikes this morning. 

Because I'm just trying to get there.

She's lost 5 pounds already- after losing 135 last year.

And I'm avoiding the scale for now.

What I do know that 2 weeks in, a shirt I bought, never wore because it was too tight, almost donated, now fits.

It's not my preferred size.  But it fits. 

"Hey- nice shirt.  When did you get that?" <- my husband

So there's that.

So basically, I'm moving.  I'm doing something-- and while I appreciate from all my well meaning friends there are 100 other things I could be doing-- I am doing this.

I am going.

I am trying.

I am feeling great... a little tired... a little sore.... but very happy with my accomplishment of just going.

This morning was the worst.  The alarm rang and I thought "Holy shit. I have to do this every single freaking day FOREVER."

But I knew Stacey was there.

And yes, I do have to do this every single day for freaking forever.  For me.

In 15 years, I won't have to do it at 5 am.

But for now.


And I got my ass out of bed and went.

Because in a month that shirt will get donated.

Because it's too big.  Not because it's too small.



My terms.

And please don't tell my metabolism my master plan....

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