And One Time at Band Camp....
My high school band is having a reunion over the 4th of July. The band director's husband, Bill Graham, who was also the drill designer and color guard instructor, as well as a fantastic math and science teacher, has been posting pictures from the 35 years of marching band. It has been great to walk down memory lane. What really sticks out in the pictures is that no matter the year, they show kids smiling, working together and loving it.
My high school band wasn't your typical band. In fact, our entire music program wasn't exactly typical. It was exceptional. And this isn't my memory enhancing itself. I've stayed somewhat involved in music throughout my adult life and I often run into people- 2,000 miles away from my hometown- who know my band director or have heard of the program.
We competed nationally against bands from New Jersey to California. Huge schools out of major cities. We played in the Hoosier Dome, the Silver Dome, at universities. And that was just the marching band.
I was fortunate to play in a percussion ensemble that played at the National Music Educators Association conference in Chicago. Ms. Wenzel our percussion instructor was amazing. She also directed our jazz band and it was a blast. (I still remember playing for a supermarket opening, getting stuck in the frozen food section and passing around fish sticks). I was in a brass quintet that could hold its own against any professional quintet I've heard. In fact, in college, when I had opted out of music, the instrumental music director found out I was there and begged me to play. Sadly, I had really let my chops go, but he had heard our quintet at a festival and remembered it 5-6 years later. And I went to college out of state. But he knew Mrs. Graham.
It's not to brag, but I want to be clear- this wasn't just a half-time, spring concert kinda group. It was and is an institution in my home town.
For me, it was life changing.
I didn't exactly want to be in band. I love music, but honestly, I wanted to be a basketball player. At 5'4" at 12, with a decent lay up, that was reasonable. The trombone was fun, but band was too intense. But then my asthma got worse, I didn't grow much more and that dream was put on the bench (I still play a mean game of Horse). I had actually quit band by junior high and Ms. Fiezli who had taught me in 5th and 6th grade asked me to come back, just for the contest. That was all. She needed a trombonist. I figured, why not- she was nice.
If you've ever played in an ensemble- sports, music or drama- when you're part of something bigger-- it's great. So I rejoined the band.
Reluctantly.
I really only wanted to do concert band. Marching was not my thing. We were the Marching Quakers and wore three cornered hats. No joke. With knickers. I kid you not. I wasn't exactly cool to start with, so this really pretty much sealed the deal on my inner nerd. Since I wasn't a partier, I figured why not? I wasn't exactly on the road to cooldom, so band couldn't hurt.
Then, Ms. Fiezli, sneaky as she was, convinced me to try out for field commander- or as many people call it drum major- as a sophomore. She thought it would be a good experience. Not very many sophomores were selected over the years. I thought I was safe. I liked to keep a low profile.
I made it.
Oops.
Now not only was I in marching band, I was one of the leaders.
Unlike many of the prior field commanders, I didn't rush out and buy a varsity jacket with FIELD COMMANDER on it. In fact, I never bought one. To me, at first, it was something that I did so I could play in the quintet and jazz band. I also got a double knit polyester skirt in lieu of the knickers. A bonus.
But it was in marching band that I learned how to lead people. I learned to get over my severe shyness. I learned what motivates people. I learned how to get others to lead. I learned to be organized. I learned hard work. I learned that falling off the box (literally, not figuratively) does not break you. I learned that when the beat is off and you're losing control, focus on the 1-2 people who can really help you bring it back together (the snare line) and block out the rest. I learned that at 15, I could get 135 kids lined up, quiet, focused and lead them into an NFL stadium as the adults watched from the sidelines. I learned that sometimes adults don't play nice. I learned that everyone matters and one mistake, from one person not caring can cost you. I learned that there was life outside of my home town. I learned that absolutely anything is possible if you work together and dream big.
(I also learned more than there is room to type from the Graham's, but that's a story for a different day. Let's just say that if you think I'm a nice, good person, thank them.)
My senior year we won our class at Grand Nationals. It was a first for our school. We had a lot of second places. We won a lot of regionals. But my senior year, we won our class.
I am 42 years old. That moment still ranks in the top 10 for me.
We won. Our little rust belt, small town high school won our class and finished 10th in the nation.
For all the crap that I took for being a band nerd, for all the teasing I still get about having been a band nerd (and yes, I do have stories that start "and one time at band camp..."), I have this amazing moment that is shared with 135 other people that I still proudly call my friends.
At the end of the day, I'm just a hack trombonist who loves music.
But that feeling of accomplishment is part of my soul.
So laugh if you will, but one time at band camp, I learned that anything is possible.
My high school band wasn't your typical band. In fact, our entire music program wasn't exactly typical. It was exceptional. And this isn't my memory enhancing itself. I've stayed somewhat involved in music throughout my adult life and I often run into people- 2,000 miles away from my hometown- who know my band director or have heard of the program.
We competed nationally against bands from New Jersey to California. Huge schools out of major cities. We played in the Hoosier Dome, the Silver Dome, at universities. And that was just the marching band.
I was fortunate to play in a percussion ensemble that played at the National Music Educators Association conference in Chicago. Ms. Wenzel our percussion instructor was amazing. She also directed our jazz band and it was a blast. (I still remember playing for a supermarket opening, getting stuck in the frozen food section and passing around fish sticks). I was in a brass quintet that could hold its own against any professional quintet I've heard. In fact, in college, when I had opted out of music, the instrumental music director found out I was there and begged me to play. Sadly, I had really let my chops go, but he had heard our quintet at a festival and remembered it 5-6 years later. And I went to college out of state. But he knew Mrs. Graham.
It's not to brag, but I want to be clear- this wasn't just a half-time, spring concert kinda group. It was and is an institution in my home town.
For me, it was life changing.
I didn't exactly want to be in band. I love music, but honestly, I wanted to be a basketball player. At 5'4" at 12, with a decent lay up, that was reasonable. The trombone was fun, but band was too intense. But then my asthma got worse, I didn't grow much more and that dream was put on the bench (I still play a mean game of Horse). I had actually quit band by junior high and Ms. Fiezli who had taught me in 5th and 6th grade asked me to come back, just for the contest. That was all. She needed a trombonist. I figured, why not- she was nice.
If you've ever played in an ensemble- sports, music or drama- when you're part of something bigger-- it's great. So I rejoined the band.
Reluctantly.
I really only wanted to do concert band. Marching was not my thing. We were the Marching Quakers and wore three cornered hats. No joke. With knickers. I kid you not. I wasn't exactly cool to start with, so this really pretty much sealed the deal on my inner nerd. Since I wasn't a partier, I figured why not? I wasn't exactly on the road to cooldom, so band couldn't hurt.
Then, Ms. Fiezli, sneaky as she was, convinced me to try out for field commander- or as many people call it drum major- as a sophomore. She thought it would be a good experience. Not very many sophomores were selected over the years. I thought I was safe. I liked to keep a low profile.
I made it.
Oops.
Now not only was I in marching band, I was one of the leaders.
Unlike many of the prior field commanders, I didn't rush out and buy a varsity jacket with FIELD COMMANDER on it. In fact, I never bought one. To me, at first, it was something that I did so I could play in the quintet and jazz band. I also got a double knit polyester skirt in lieu of the knickers. A bonus.
But it was in marching band that I learned how to lead people. I learned to get over my severe shyness. I learned what motivates people. I learned how to get others to lead. I learned to be organized. I learned hard work. I learned that falling off the box (literally, not figuratively) does not break you. I learned that when the beat is off and you're losing control, focus on the 1-2 people who can really help you bring it back together (the snare line) and block out the rest. I learned that at 15, I could get 135 kids lined up, quiet, focused and lead them into an NFL stadium as the adults watched from the sidelines. I learned that sometimes adults don't play nice. I learned that everyone matters and one mistake, from one person not caring can cost you. I learned that there was life outside of my home town. I learned that absolutely anything is possible if you work together and dream big.
(I also learned more than there is room to type from the Graham's, but that's a story for a different day. Let's just say that if you think I'm a nice, good person, thank them.)
My senior year we won our class at Grand Nationals. It was a first for our school. We had a lot of second places. We won a lot of regionals. But my senior year, we won our class.
I am 42 years old. That moment still ranks in the top 10 for me.
We won. Our little rust belt, small town high school won our class and finished 10th in the nation.
For all the crap that I took for being a band nerd, for all the teasing I still get about having been a band nerd (and yes, I do have stories that start "and one time at band camp..."), I have this amazing moment that is shared with 135 other people that I still proudly call my friends.
At the end of the day, I'm just a hack trombonist who loves music.
But that feeling of accomplishment is part of my soul.
So laugh if you will, but one time at band camp, I learned that anything is possible.
Comments
But, the band was the part of our high school that actually won awards! Not the football team, baseball team, track team...It was most definitely the band that was exceptional! I think people can look back and realize how true that is.
Robert Harmon
As a member of that band that won that championship I appreciate all that you have said! Not to mention....it was my senior year when we won again two years later!
I would not trade those high school years for anything! I, like you, feel that those experiences and those people helped shape who I am today. Many people would never go back, given the chance, to high school - I am not one of those people. I would do it all over again if I could. There were so many kids that never had the chance to experience what we did as teenagers. When I think about all the places we got to travel to and all the things we got to see it was an education like no other!
Many of the people who were my friends in high school are still my friends today (you included). Not too many people can say that. We were not just friends, we were a family and the Graham's were our parents. Today even, these two people are like my kids third set of grandparents.
So, thank you for saying what most of us marching quakers felt, and still feel about our high school band program!
Becky (Jacoby) Furbay
Steph Price
I watched Mrs. Graham work with MANY students who could barely tell their left from their right, couldn't read music to save their life and couldn't find a beat. Or couldn't write a coherent sentence using proper English. I also saw her help students who were pregnant. Or students whose parents were abusing them. Or students who were going down the wrong path. I never saw her turn away any student when they wanted to return to band- assuming they were committed to working hard.
As for your personal attack, I'm sorry, but that's hilarious and doesn't garner any comments. It was 25 years ago. Get over it.
I can't imagine.....you want to post your comment but not own it. I don't believe the Graham's ever showed favortism towards anyone. You had to work hard for the spots/positions that were assigned to you. There were several times I recall being drilled (guard group) after a performance/competition and it wasn't pretty but I appreciate the fact that nothing was ever sugar coated. If you want to be a competitor you want your instructor to tell it like it is because it makes you try harder the next time around. The Graham's were not trying to be mean and it's too bad you took it that way. I'm just wondering how on earth you handle constructive criticism in the real world. Like Lorie said, "It was 25 years ago. Get over it."
Lisa Amos
As for the Graham's, I have had the pleasure of teaching with them off and on for the last 20 or so years and they continue to volunteer countless hours to the program along with their home and their money to any in need. As a student I learned a lot from the band, but teaching with Mr. G is like a master teaching class in and of itself. Thanks Mama Bean for a great blog post and for reminding us of one magical moment.
And to anonymous....I suggest you get some professional help. Let it go...25 years AND as a blogger myself, if you can't put your name to it and OWN it you're pathetic.
If you are 2 years younger than me, Jeff was on staff- not a student- when you were in band. He was a senior when I was a freshmen. Yes, staff people did have perks over students.
Also, don't be mistaken, this ISN'T an open forum. This is MY forum. MY opinion. If you READ the disclosure that I put on MY blog, you would have understood that. If you want to voice YOUR opinion then write your own blog. Clearly you have a LOT of pent up issues about high school that you need to work through. I also have a very nice request that says I don't post items that people don't sign. I posted your original complaint out of a courtesy because I do post others' opinions regularly.
As for Jeff, considering that he is the current band director and has dedicated his life to teaching students, I think the "favoritism" he was shown was really based on his dedication and commitment. I think it was a good investment of time on the Graham's part to nurture and encourage someone who they felt would carry on their legacy. They have groomed at least 8 other band directors- and those are just from kids I knew in band.
I didn't post your previous whiny complaint about being attacked because it was childish- YOU personally attacked people, took no responsibility for what you said and then when others disagreed with what you wrote previously and dished it back, you whined about it.
I'm thinking that might be why you weren't successful in a team environment and weren't looked upon as a leader- or a "favorite."
YOU said they were "hurtful" to kids- I consider that being "bad.". I never saw that. Ever. They had high standards and didn't put up with kids who dialed it in.
I also beg to differ about being a "favorite"- I busted my butt- I spent many nights, long after all the other kids were home, figuring out to teach drill, watching videos to help improve sections that were in another planet, tutoring kids who weren't going to make the grade requirement to compete. I don't think the Graham's favored me- I think they had a lot of respect for a young girl who worked extremely hard. All that "favoritism" that you alleged was really a lot of extra hours doing a lot of work that very few people saw. If anything, they were far harder on me than anyone else because they had very high expectations. It was me, the other FC's who packed everything up every single night, drove kids home who didn't have rides-- for every band practice that you attended (if you were even in band), I can assure I spent another 2 hours doing all those "extra perks"-like picking up trash.
Just some food for thought. I have no idea why you seem to have an ax to grind with me, Jeff or the Graham's.
And I absolutely positively will not post another comment from you unless you sign your name.
You gotta love haters who spew venom like that and won't put their name to it. I don't put any stock in people's opinions when they can't spell or use proper grammar. If they didn't pay attention in English class, they haven't paid attention to much else in life either - and not worth listening too. It is your absolute right to not publish someone's comment (funny that "Anonymous" didn't read down that far!). But I do appreciate that you put it up there now - it gave me a good laugh for the day.
Anonymous, I certainly hope that you've not grown up to be "one of THOSE people" who blame EVERYONE ELSE for the problems in their life, and have such a ridiculous sense of entitlement that you have allowed yourself to become a stagnant and small person. Such a shame to have learned nothing from those who cared so much about you and your future.
I agree with Lori's request to take ownership of your commentary. However, I also believe that your name doesn't really matter. We know who you are simply by the content of your character displayed here.
The other band members DID have the opportunity to do what I did. I auditioned, as did everyone who wanted, in front of other band directors and past field commanders- not the Graham's or the other band directors. We auditioned in front of the band- and every year I was the top choice by my fellow band members. We even had a written test one year. In fact, the year I made it, it was a bit of a scandal because some of the boosters' kids didn't make it. One even pulled their kid out of band. So no, I most definitely was not handed it nor were any of the others.
If you or your friends thought they could have done it, they should have tried out. And if they did try out and didn't make it, it's because they didn't cut it.
I absolutely agree that teachers have favorites. I've received many emails from past teachers saying I was one of their favorites (ironically, not the Graham's!) but it's because I was engaged, bright and cared in high school. I think what you perceived in high school was that because students were favorites they received special treatment-- I would argue that they became favorites because they were willing to go the extra mile. Mrs. Wittkop and I were extremely close (closer than I was or am to the Grahan's) because of all the hours we spent working on student council projects and discussing books. It didn't mean I didn't do homework or got an A. I would say she, like Mrs. Rapport, were harder on me because they knew my ability.
My husband is a teacher and a coach. He has favorites. They are the kids who put in the most effort- regardless of ability. We become close to students each year who have overcome adversity, work extra jobs to support families-- and we absolutely help them with jobs and connections when we can. It doesn't impact their grades.
I have a successful business, have done well throughout my life and I am constantly perplexed by the people who sit back and say how lucky I am and how they could have done it, but yet didn't.
It's because I take risks, put myself out there and work very hard. Very, very hard.
And I learned that in band. By trying out for field commander.
This is Anonymous #2. You make a good point. Perhaps it was all in my perspective. Mrs. Graham really hurt me my 1st year in band and I never got over it. My apologies.
Do I feel their were favorites. As a kid and young adult most deffinately yes. BUT, I never saw the extra work you did (not to say you didn't and I belive you did). Was I jealous? Absolutely! I wanted to be FC as well, but as my scattered brain wouldn't keep it together. Not anyones fault it's the way I was born.. But did I feel anger and jealousy towards successful classmates? Sure! I wanted to be popular, I always wanted to find that 1 thing that would change peoples perspective of me and give me a chance in friendship.
About the Grahams. They never gave up on me, and found ways to push me to accell to the maximum of my abilities. I have heard others stories that are not nice and I won't discount them as they are entitled to their story and perspective. But for me they were awesome and alot of who I am today as a productive member of society is a direct result of their dedication to not letting me fail! They never gave up on me, even when I had given up on myself.
The thing is now as an adult and parent I now understand alot. Time heals some wounds, and some wounds will never. To some people I still have hatred for their cruelty beyond measure. It may not make sense to some, but it's how I feel. I think Lori you worked very hard and accelled as a direct result of that. I think as I look back that you were the correct choice for FC and I think you did a bang up job and I remember truely being proud of the Field Commanders that represented us in the front of the band. I was and still am very proud of being in band. But I hope this mess of a comment is read as "What I felt then is not what I feel and understand now" This journey of understanding my childhood and the people who were in it is still evolving to this day. I still live with ADD/ADHD and I sometimes can be a difficult person to know untill you take the time to understand how my scattered brain works.
I hope this helps you and annonomous Lori. And maybe this wasn't the place for me to share this but I just felt compelled to share my opinion and shed light on where my perspective comes from..
Mike Jarvis
While I may have felt there were favorites when I was younger, as an adult I know know and feel the "favorites" were kids that worked hard and proved they could be counted on above the others. So they were given MORE responsibility as well as perks as well as attention and it was deserved for your hard work and dedication. As an adult I realise Mrs Graham had more reason to talk to a field commander than a regular band member. She may have noticed you being blue or out of sorts because she spent more time with you and knew you better. Not anyone's fault that's just how it works. As a kid that could be viewed as someone being a favorite. Adulthood and perspective should squash the kid way of thinking.. If there is one thing I've learned in life it is to make sure you see things from all sides and others points of view before making judgements. You do yourself and them a disservice if you only consider your own.
Mike Jarvis
What a wonderful demonstration of love and admiration by posting your remembrances of Cheryl, Bill, Marva and Joan. I still maintain contact with them from time to time and even worked as Marva's assistant Marching Band director for several years when she was finishing her teaching career at Chagrin Falls High School near Cleveland.
I agree with you that the music students at NPHS during that time period had so many unique, specialized, and quality ensembles from which to choose, I use it as my theoretical model as I begin my own teaching career soon. After 20 years as a performer I will offer what I can as an educator of young musicians and artists.
I used to keep my pride in those experiences to myself out of fear of being labelled a "re-liver", someone who continually places themselves in the past without moving on to new endeavors. But I now proudly revisit those days between 1984 and 1988 (knowing that I do, indeed, have a life that goes beyond those years mentioned) and cherish those shared experiences with my friends and (now) colleagues, knowing that those experiences were life-changing ones. They were Real experiences for every student that wanted them. That program (NPHS) took EVERYONE, regardless of ability, and gave each student the opportunity to participate fully, or to just do the base requirement.
Joan created the opportunity that allowed the percussion ensemble to play for two of the "heavies" in collegiate percussion pedagogy. I auditioned for each of them later in my college career and they remembered that experience, too. The percussion dept. gave carwash upon carwash to earn money for new drums (Pearl) and during the winter of my senior year, Joan bought a set of used steel pans from Illinois (with her own money) and created a steel band in the image of her (and my) alma mater, the University of Akron.
Cheryl asked me to come back to New Philadelphia in 2004 and offer a day of percussion to elementary students. Even after 15 years away, she was involved with past students and keeping them involved in the system she loves. Cheryl ,and the entire staff, was, and still is, a student-centered educator. That staff was a unique blend of styles, each with their strengths that were able to be presented in ways that enhanced to program. During my 5 years there, I can count on one hand the times I read music the was a stock arrangement. FIVE years worth of music and over 95% of it hand written, arranged and created by Joan Wenzel! That is amazing! Marva did the same thing! Amazing!!
So, Yea, I'll revisit those days for inspiration and may steal a few ideas from that staff for my own program someday. Why not?? They gave us students an experience that many of us will never be able to have again at any level. And most of us (40-somethings) are now fully realizing that gift.
So, thank you, Lori. for bringing this to our attention again at a time when we can really start to understand the breadth and uniqueness of that experience.
PS I was thinking about trying out for Field Commander as an 11th grader, but Joan told me if I did, she'd kill me. I don't think she said that, but her eyes and pursed mouth did. You were a fantastic FC, as well as Julie and Nita. By far, one of the better looking FC corps we had during those years. LOL
And while your ADD may have made us crazy ("Mike.....HOLD STILL!!!) I don't think anyone ever doubted your commitment. And I remember you being bullied...I'd still be pissed, too. If it makes you feel better, one of them got taken down a few notches in college. I ran into him a few years later and he apologized for being an ass. And his back story was really awful...talk about a bad home life...it's why he bullied you. But we should have done more to stop it.
Your post is amazing. I'm glad we're back in touch!
But seriously, Joan is to blame for you not auditioning? We would have had a blast... you would have looked awful in the skirt, though. And we did need you in the snare line. You and Dave were those 2 people I looked to to pull us out of many quagmires!
I love how you recognize the Graham's dedication as a professional . I don't think we fully appreciated it at the time. Or the quality of instruction. I didn't even think about the stock arrangements.... that's all I ever saw after high school.
You are so talented and I'm so glad you're teaching.