I am a complete dork.
I am. I always have been.
I'm not sure when it started. Having a speech impediment as a kid pretty much labels you as odd early on, so maybe then?
Or maybe it was the mass of curly hair?
Who knows? I just have never really fit and I've never been nor have ever tried to be cool.
Well, that's not exactly true-- some days I think I'm cool and then I trip and fall.
I met my friend Ellen for coffee at this hip cafe downtown and I told her I was going to wear black and wear a hat so I would look cool. We both cracked up because neither one of us is particularly cool. She shared with me about her hilarious times working in LA- which is wanna be cool person mecca-- and being uncool.
It's probably why we are friends.
Being an uncool dork has actually worked for me. Throughout my life I have been told that I am, in fact, cool because I am so myself.
That makes me laugh.
And usually spit a little and realize I have spinach in my teeth.
And then trip.
And wheeze a little while I laugh.
Because I am definitely, if nothing else, 100% myself. I am not graceful. I am not elegant. I always look a little off. I never have a good hair day and clear skin day on the same day. Ever.
I'm a dork.
I tell silly jokes. That I laugh at even if no one else does.
I dance in public. Even when the music is in my head.
I laugh far too loud. I don't know when to shut up. I ask too many questions. I fart at inappropriate times.
I have no sense of style aside from comfortable. I go off on tangents. I overthink things.
I have not just muffin tops, but also muffin sides and bottoms.
My hair- well-- it's independent.
I can't lie and I roll my eyes.
Beer and soda make me gassy to a point that I can't drink them in public.
I spill nearly everything I eat or drink down my front.
I didn't just go to band camp as a kid-- I went to math camp. And I cried when I left.
But I have to say, I've always embraced my dorkiness. Today the song "Groove is in the Heart" was stuck in my head. I LOVE that song just not all day, ringing through my brain while I'm trying to work.
A normal person would not have been able to break out into song throughout the day in this situation. I am already a dork. I can. It's poetic license to be weird.
Weird is awesome.
I was at a conference this week and one woman that I know who is fairly successful shared a few years ago that her secret to client acquisition is being the coolest person her clients know. She suggested I do more cool things. I spit laughed.
Me clubbing... me spending the day at the spa--- seriously? I can think of 100 wardrobe malfunctions and embarrassing situations in less than 5 seconds.
She can be cool. As for me, I will embrace my inner dork.
Being cool is far too exhausting.
So cheers to my fellow dorks! May your glass always be half full and spill slightly as you drink!